We have grown past the necessary self-focused stage of trauma recovery and are looking outwards again, noticing things we previously took for granted. We might experience horror, aversion or renewed despair when we see the world as it really is, now that our bubbles have burst.

There is a lingering factor in the aftermath of abuse that is difficult to grasp. Shame. Why does our culture shame victims? One woman's take on dealing with being shamed by others and shaming ourselves. A case study and method for healing shame.

The narcissistic sociopath’s capacity for playing dirty should never be underestimated. Without a conscience and incapable of feeling remorse, there is barely any unconscionable behaviour that is off limits in a playing field that is hidden from public view, like the Family Court…

Learn how to set healthier, more protective boundaries. after narcissistic abuse. Protecting ourselves from further damage. We need our own protection, strength and self-compassion more than ever before in our lives.

Survivors of narcissistic abuse can develop anxieties that they have developed a personality disorder as a result of their abuse. Causation is the difference. Trauma can heal, narcissism is pathological.

The principles of a man devoid of empathy, conscience and morals are very simple. I’ll take whatever I want, no matter what the harm to others.

Narcissist, Sociopath, Psychopath or Jerk

Just how dangerous is your ex? Is he just behaving like an angry jerk or is he dangerously manipulative and abusive? Can we ever be friends again?

Peeling the layers of the onion after a relationship with a narcissistic sociopath keeps you crying until the very last layer has been peeled away. It's the maze of smoke and mirrors he has employed over an extended period of time to wrongly convict you that sinks you. The pain of the shame snare is perhaps greater than the original loss.

There is a weird phenomenon. By blaming the victim. By pointing out how they brought it on themselves. By telling them to 'get over it'. By telling them we don't want to know about their troubles because we have troubles of our own. By relieving ourselves of our duty as family and friends to support and empower rather than belittle and demean, we can cause secondary trauma.

Betrayal trauma is one of the most severe forms of psychological trauma that a human can undergo, yet it is un-acknowledged in our culture (aside from childhood betrayal). This lack of recognition can lead to those betrayed having their trauma minimised and demeaned, thus leading to secondary trauma. Betrayal is a wound to the soul: a deep moral injury.

Why does this site and every other Narcissistic Abuse support site recommend NO CONTACT? Because he gets a buzz out of inflicting pain on YOU.

One thing that characterises Narcissistic Abuse from other toxic behaviours is the repeated stealthy violation of our core values. These values bond us to our abuser(s), at the same time as their violation causes us great pain. We are torn. This kind of injury is what is meant by a moral injury.

Tips from women who have survived the devastating impact of relationships with pathologically disordered men. You can recover from this. You are stronger than you think. Recovery is a long, winding road.

Your limbic system kicks in, floods your body with fear hormones and adrenalin and you can shift between wanting to fight, freeze or run for your life, but you just can't regain your normal composure from that moment forth. Your body won't let you. It's in your body.

Here are some manipulation techniques that fly under the radar for those trusting souls amongst us. In order of escalation - as the narcopath tightens the screw.

This break-up is different from other break ups you’ve had before. Why? It’s not like you haven’t had a break up before is it? But this one is different. Very, very different. Here’s why…

This is how you know you are or were the victim of psychological manipulation by an extreme narcissist or sociopath. This devaluation behaviour starts the moment you are bonded or ‘hooked’. Then it escalates.

There are certain cruel or sadistic pathologies in a narcissistic or sociopathic relationship that just aren’t normal. The lack of empathy and conscience in your ex-partner are to blame.

Every interpersonal relationship of a narcopath passes through these three (or four) phases as a repetition compulsion. You and I might have a repeating relationship pattern too, and find ourselves drawn time and again to similar types.