Episode 10: What Is Moral Injury?

Understanding how our own values and empathy led us into the snare of the manipulative narcopath

One thing that characterises narcissistic abuse from other toxic behaviours is the repeated stealthy violation of our core values. These values bond us to our abuser(s), at the same time as their violation causes us great pain. We are torn. This kind of injury is what is meant by a moral injury. Here are a few of those:

Trust: was used as a way of taking advantage of us. If our suspicions were aroused, he douses them quickly with, “Don’t you trust me?” making us feel defective for not trusting the one person in our lives we ‘should’ be able to trust – our partner. He can then conduct his covert affairs feeling confident that we won’t violate his privacy (read his diary, check his text messages, question his spending from joint accounts or any other detective work). We are made to feel we have to trust him even though we already know we don’t (cognitive dissonance)……